I got home from work about 2 hours ago, dropped my bag, filled the kettle, turned on my laptop and opened tumblr.
It’s now 12:21am. I have yet to remove my coat. Tumblr has officially taken over my life.
Sometimes in daily life I like to pretend I’m a time traveler from late medieval Europe and I’m just fucking amazed at my luxurious life
Let me tell you, 14th c me is REALLY impressed with modern me’s easy access to pepper and cinnamon
"you have multiple purple garments? you must be a person of some note"
"these chairs are fantastically luxurious"
"I’ve never seen so much salt in one place"
All these spices, but so few sheep! In fact, there may even be fewer sheep than there are people! This is unheard of!
Thank you highly anonymous anon to whom I have no clues regarding the identity of… ahem…
My gif folder is highly unorganised so I spent ages attempting to sift through what were gifs and what were pictures (or ebooks, or that draft of that essay that I swore I started but couldn’t find), but I think this one is me in a nutshell:
Except, I try and disguise it so I don’t scare people, so it’s more like:
Life hack: if someone makes a racist/sexist joke, say, with total seriousness, “I don’t get it, can you explain it”
Then watch them crash and burn
"…And then I said, ‘go make me a sandwich!’ haw haw haw."
"I don’t get it."
"What’s not to get."
"Why would she make you a sandwich?"
"Because… She’s a girl."
"You can’t make yourself a sandwich?"
"I can make myself a sandwich."
"Cool, go make me one too."
[Smooth Criminal plays]